January 6, 2010

Luke 6
This chapter is so rich, so full. I want to eat it, digest it. I want it to become part of me.

“You're blessed when you've lost it all.
God's kingdom is there for the finding.

You're blessed when you're ravenously hungry.
Then you're ready for the Messianic meal.

You're blessed when the tears flow freely.
Joy comes with the morning.”

I feel like this is where I’m at. I’m empty, I’m dry, I’m lost, I’m hungry. I’m ready to be filled, quenched, found and I’m ready for the Messianic Meal.

“But it's trouble ahead if you think you have it made.
What you have is all you'll ever get.

And it's trouble ahead if you're satisfied with yourself.
Your self will not satisfy you for long.

And it's trouble ahead if you think life's all fun and games.
There's suffering to be met, and you're going to meet it.”

I’ve rested on my laurels for too long. My family faith, my Christian experiences (missions, church career, leadership positions, Biblical knowledge, Christian school.) Those things aren’t wrong or wasted, but they aren’t fresh and vital. They are meaningless though without true relationship with my Saviour. So where do I go from here? I’m weary of formulas. What do I know? I know that I need to be in the Word of God. It’s how He communicates primarily. His Word is rich and fresh and challenging. I’m going to write my thoughts and share them with others in honesty and vulnerability. I’m going to read books that challenge and heal. I’m going to love in practical ways. I’m going to speak to God. I’m going to listen for his voice.

I’ve been a Christian for more than 30 years, I come from an amazing, faith-filled family, I’ve served God and His church for many years and in many ways. I’ve experienced seasons fo incredible passion and vitality in my relationship with God. All these things are part of the fabric of my life, but they are not enough to sustain me now. After years of faith and service, I feel like it’s time to find God again, to come like a child, to love and be loved.